I have become what I most fear

Song Recommendation: Demon Host by Timber Timbre

Death she must have been your will

A bone beneath the reaper's veil

With your voice my belly sunk

And I began to feel so drunk

Candle candle on my clock

Oh lord I must have heard you knock me out of bed

As the flames licked my head and my lungs filled up black in their tiny little shack

It was real and I repent

All those messages you sent clear as day, but in the night

Oh I couldn't get it right

Here is a church and here is a steeple

Open the doors there are the people

And all their little hearts at ease

For another week's disease

And eagle eagle towel and scream

I never once left in between

I was on the fence and I never wanted your two cents

Down my throat in the pit, with my head upon the spit

Oh reverend please can I chew your ear? I have become what I most fear

And I know there's no such thing as ghosts but I have seen the demon host…

I stayed there for a while 'til they discovered I was dead.

Song recommendation: Last Trip to Tulsa by Neil Young

Well, I used to drive a cab,

you know

I heard a siren scream

Pulled over to the corner

And I fell into a dream

There were

two men eating pennies

And three young girls who cried

The West coast is falling,

I see rocks in the sky.

The preacher took his bible

And laid it on the stool.

He said: with

the congregation running,

Why should I play the fool?

Well, I used to be a woman,

you know

I took you for a ride,

I let you fly my airplane

It looked good for your pride.

'Cause you're

the kind of man you know

Who likes what he says.

I wonder what's it's like

To be so far over my head.

Well, the lady made the wedding

And she brought along the ring.

She got down on her knees

And said: Let's

get on with this thing.

Well, I used to be a folk singer

Keeping managers alive,

When you saw me on a corner

And told me I was jive.

So I unlocked your mind, you know

To see what I could see.

If you guarantee the postage,

I'll mail you back the key.

Well I woke up in the morning

With an arrow through my nose

There was an Indian in the corner

Tryin' on my clothes.

Well, I used to be asleep

you know

With blankets on my bed.

I stayed there for a while

'Til they discovered I was dead.

The coroner was friendly

And I liked him quite a lot.

If I hadn't 've been a woman

I guess I'd never have been caught.

They gave me back my house and car

And nothing more was said.

Well, I was driving

down the freeway

When my car ran out of gas.

Pulled over to the station

But I was afraid to ask.

The servicemen were yellow

And the gasoline was green.

Although I knew I couldn't

I thought that I was gonna scream.

That was on my last trip to Tulsa

Just before the snow.

If you ever need a ride there,

Be sure to let me know.

I was chopping down a palm tree

When a friend dropped by to ask

If I would feel less lonely

If he helped me swing the axe.

I said: No, it's

not a case of being lonely

We have here,

I've been working on this palm tree

For eighty seven years

I said: No, it's

not a case of being lonely

We have here,

I've been working on this palm tree

For eighty seven years

He said: Go get lost!

And walked towards his Cadillac.

I chopped down the palm tree

And it landed on his back.

I am only shouting in my heart

Normally I stick to English songs, but I just finished the Korean drama You're Beautiful.  I absolutely love it!!!!  Here is the cover song Tae Kyung sings to convey his feelings to Mi Nyu:

What Should I do?

Here are the English lyrics :

(the wording might be a bit different because the translator isn't the same as the one who did the subtitle)

When I let you go one step further, my eyes overflow with tears

When you walk away one step further, more tears are falling

As you move away to a place where I can’t reach you, even if I reach out my hand

I can’t catch you, I can only cry

What should I do? What should I do? You’re leaving

What should I do? What should I do? You’re leaving me

I love you, I love you, I cry out to you

But you can’t hear me, because I am only shouting in my heart

All day long I try to forget you, but I think of you again

All day long I try to say goodbye, but I think of you

Although you went to a place where I can’t hold you, even if my hand reaches out for you

I can’t find you, I can only cry

What should I do? What should I do? I can only see you

What should I do? What should I do? I love you only

I am sorry, I am sorry, can you hear me?

Please come back to me, if it’s not you, I can’t go on

What should I do? What should I do? I only have you

What should I do? What should I do? You’re leaving

What should I do? What should I do? You’re leaving me alone

I love you, I love you, I cry out to you

But you can’t hear me because I am only shouting in my heart

Liebster Award Nomination

Thank you Chibiko!!!!!!  I am really a failure as a blogger, but you nominated me!!!  I feel so happy!!!!

From what I read from Chibiko's Blog, this is how it works:

1. 11 facts about yourself

2. Answer the 11 questions the blogger who nominated you left.

3. Ask 11 new questions for those who you nominate.

4. Choose 11 bloggers with less than 200 followers to nominate.

5. Go to each blogger's page and let them know about the award.

6. Thank the person who nominated you and link back to their blog.

Okay, lets start with the facts about me.

1. I love listening to music (as most of you know) and I have a very wide range in my musical taste.  I like almost all kinds of music (except for the mainstream AM crap).

2. If all goes well, I'll be grading for my Black Belt in Goju Ryu Karate this summer.

Trying to figure out how the dance to their old job's  commercial went...

3. Right now, my favourite drama is You're Beautiful (Korean drama).  I'm in love with Shin Woo (center), Jeremy (right) and Tae Kyung (left) !!!!!  Sometimes I want to kill Yoo He Yi...  AND I CRIED WHEN JEREMY CONFESSED TO MI NAM!!!!!

4. I play a few instruments  the bari sax, the trombone and the baritone BC.  Because the baari sax is broken, I mostly play the latter two.

5. I am a genuine trekkie.  I have watched all series but deep space nine and I have watched all the movies.  Also, for those of you who are excited as I am... 105 SLEEPS UNTIL STAR TREK 2!!!!!!!!!!!

6. Deadpool is my hero.  He is awesome.  If I had more time to play video games, I'd buy his game.

7. I still read manga and I still watch anime.  No, that doesn't make me a kid, it makes me... an otaku... -.-

8. I have never dated at all.  There are a few guys who  I have liked, but nothing has come out of it.

9. I plan to go into medical research when I'm older.  Probably Oncology (cancer research).  I want to make a difference in the world in any way I can.

10. I am monotone.  I tried choir, but I couldn't sing high enough to be an Alto and I couldn't sing low enough to be a Tenor... therefore I am monotone.

11.I love poetry and photography, especially combining my pictures with my poems.  I find that they compliment each other and they bring the most out of each other.

Now for Chibiko's questions!!!!!

1. Why did you start blogging and how long?

I started because you started baka!!!  Just like you dragged me into tumblr and Skype and so many other things (that we talked about earlier on facebook).  I've been blogging since... December 2010.  Two Years and a bit

2. Who's your dream man/woman and describe in great detail. I'm curious!! :)

Oh God!!!! >///<  I-I can't say such things here....  He would be tall, well built, but not too muscular... Charming, funny, into music like I am... Caring, committed and hard-working.  I don't know what else to say.

3. Any pets? 

You know about Carma!!!! Before her we had Keela who died at the age of 14.  She was a Irish Setter - Golden Retriever cross.  She thought that she was the main female of the house and that my mom just played second fiddle.

4. If you are a manga freak, what is your favorite manga/anime out there? If not, what is your favorite book and why?

How can you ask such a question?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?  Fairy Tail, Naruto, Skip Beat, Seiyuu-ka, Charming Junkie, FMA, Zatch Bell... I LOVE 'EM ALL SO MUCH!!!!!

5. Favorite food when you were a kid and why.

Grilled cheese sandwich!!!!!!!!!  No further explanation required.  The food talks for itself!!!!

6. Be serious, if you could describe a perfect life, how would you?

Imagine, by John Lennon

7. Speak any second languages??? :D

Je parle le Français depuis douze ans.  Le plupart de mes cours son en Français et je lùtilise plusieurs fois quand je travail.  (I speak French)

8. What would your definition of beautiful be? 

Someone who lives life to the fullest and who has the strength to push through hard times.  Beauty is also  the ability to help others before you help yourself.

9. It's almost Valentines Day and if you had a boyfriend/girlfriend, what would your ideal date be?

Just hanging out and talking.  I love talking to people, and I love being with people.  There does not need to be a specific place and we don`t need to be spending money.  NO PHONES.  Just ourselves.

10. Do you like DARK or MILK chocolate? 

DARK CHOCOLATE!!!!! Not only is it better for you, but it doesn`t have the same after taste that milk chocolate has.  My favourite is 99% Cocoa....

11. What's your most embarrassing moments? 

After worrying about being homo,
he is happy when when  gets hyped up over women's undergarments...
I love you Nakatsu!!!!

Well nothing like this has ever happened to me... I can't really think of any embarrassing moments...  Everyone has little embarrassing moments, but none of mine have been so bad that I'd recall them.


Now for my questions!!!! Let's see...

1. What is you favourite band? (If you can't decide, please list a few that you love)
2. What is your favourite Marvel movie? (if you don't know what Marvel is, I will personally kill you)
3. Who is your favourite character in Big Bang Theory?  (If you don't watch / like it, name your favourite show and tell me your favourite character)
4. Which do you prefer and why: Star Trek, Star Wars or Stargate?
5. Why did you start blogging?
6. Play any sports?  (Martial Arts included)
7. What do you prefer and why: listening to music or playing music?
8. Since Valentine's Day is coming up, I might as well as something related to it: do you have a crush / significant other and what would be your ideal date?
9. What is your favourite Disney movie?
10. What do you plan to do when you're older? (please be a bit more specific than "be alive")
11. If you could wish for anything in the world, what would it be? (x-nay on the wishing for more wishes!)

Now for the 11 that I'll nominate:

1. Chibiko Nanami (if I can re-nominate you... you don't have to redo your post, but i'd love to hear the answers to my questions...)
2. Jen
3. Nathaniel Lee
4. Coleen

... Those are the only people whose blogs I follow and who have less than 200 followers...

There we go!  I'm done.  That took longer than I expected... oh well, it was worth it!

My baby's meaner than the devil, after you shake his cage...

Meaner Than You - The United Steelworkers of Montreal

The time device of self-destruction: Paranoia

Destroyer - The Kinks

Met a girl called Lola and I took her back to my place

Feelin' guilty, feelin' scared, hidden cameras everywhere

Stop! Hold on. Stay in control

Girl, I want you here with me

But I'm really not as cool as I'd like to be

'Cause there's a red, under my bed

And there's a little yellow man in my head

And there's a true blue inside of me

That keeps stoppin' me, touchin' ya, watchin' ya, lovin' ya

Paranoia, the destroyer.

Paranoia, the destroyer.

Well I fell asleep, then I woke feelin' kinda' queer

Lola looked at me and said, "ooh you look so weird."

She said, "man, there's really something wrong with you.

One day you're gonna' self-destruct.

You're up, you're down, I can't work you out

You get a good thing goin' then you blow yourself out."

Silly boy ya' self-destroyer. Silly boy ya' self-destroyer

Silly boy you got so much to live for

So much to aim for, so much to try for

You blowing it all with paranoia

You're so insecure you self-destroyer

(And it goes like this, here it goes)

Paranoia, the destroyer

(Here it goes again)

Paranoia, the destroyer

Doctor, Doctor help me please, I know you'll understand

There's a time device inside of me, I'm a self-destructin' man

There's a red, under my bed

And there's a little green man in my head

And he said, "you're not goin' crazy, you're just a bit sad

'Cause there's a man in ya, gnawin' ya, tearin' ya into two."

Silly boy ya' self-destroyer.

Paranoia, the destroyer

Self-destroyer, wreck your health

Destroy friends, destroy yourself

The time device of self-destruction

Light the fuse and start eruption

(Yea, it goes like this, here it goes)

Paranoia, the destroyer

(Here's to paranoia)

Paranoia, the destroyer

(Hey hey, here it goes)

Paranoia, the destroyer

(And it goes like this)

Paranoia, the destroyer

(And it goes like this.)

Christmas Concert 2012

I'm sorry that I haven't posted much lately, but grade 12 is killer... -.-  I'm in between semesters right now so I have a bit of time...  Here's our Xmas concert:

Concert Band: Noel

Our concert band wasn't the greatest this year... Though we did recruit a violinist last minute.  With only two rehearsals she was ready for the concert!!!

Brass Quintet (plus violin): Christmas Montage

This was originally our invitational band, but so many people dropped out that we only had a handful of people.  We were saved by the violinist in this group as well.  I think if we had rehearsed this song for more than a few rehearsals  we could of done better, but we choose this last minute realizing that we couldn't play our other songs without woodwinds.

Jazz Band:
Cruella de Vil

Blue Skies

Baby Its Cold Outside (with the exchange students on vocals)

[unfortunately I can't find a video to insert, here the link and I hope you check it out!]

Baby It's Cold Outside

Moondance

Encore: Ballistic Brass!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We have trombones this year!!!! Jazz Band is as exciting as ever, I only wish that I could play my Bari Sax....

I'm not gonna post the other groups because I wasn't in them and I have run out of time to post.  I hope you enjoyed out concert!!!

Ashes of laughter, the ghost is clear

I'm trying to get our Jazz band to do this song... the love, but Mr. P still hasn't looked for the score yet...
I hope you enjoy it!!!!

Ophelia - The Band

Boards on the window

Mail by the door

Why would anybody leave so quickly for

Ophelia?

Where have you gone?

The old neighborhood

Just ain't the same

Nobody knows just

What became of

Ophelia?

Tell me what went wrong?

Was it somethin' that somebody said?

Mama I know we broke the rules

Was somebody up against the law?

Honey, you know

I'd die for you

Ashes of laughter

The ghost is clear

Why do the best things always disappear?

Like Ophelia

Please darken my door.

Was it somethin' that somebody said?

Honey, you know we broke the rule

Was somebody up against the law?

Honey you know

I'd die for you

they got your number

scared and runnin'

but I'm still waitin' for

the second coming

of Ophelia

come back home

But that was yesterday, if only today

Factory Girls - Flogging Molly

Build a bridge or maybe two

Together held with footsteps she outgrew

But now she sits alone, everyone's long gone

She dances in a photograph

When it was good to joke and have a laugh

But that was yesterday, if only today

Now the walls are crawling faces that still breathe

But before she nods her head what's left but sleep

She hears a chorus of factory girls

Singin' in the streets

Drinkin' their coca-colas

After washing your filthy sheets

Chasin’ down the avenue

After a childhood that she never knew

Choking on woodbine

Cigarettes just kill the time

Now the walls are crawling faces that still breathe

But before she nods her head what's left but sleep

She hears a chorus of factory girls

Singin's aoin and all

Empty are their pockets

But their voices are filled with song

Come day go day

Wish in my hearty it was Sunday

Drinking buttermilk all the week

And whiskey on a Sunday

Come day go day

Wish in my hearty it was Sunday

Drinking buttermilk all the week

And whiskey on a Sunday

Now the walls are crawling faces that still breathe

But before she nods her head what’s left but sleep

She hears a chorus of factory girls

Singin' in the streets

Drinkin' their coca-colas

After washing your filthy sheets

She hears a chorus of factory girls

Singin's aoin and all

Empty are their pockets

But their voices are filled with song

Stayed Richard and his court of Kings

He stole my heart and many other things

But me I took his crown

Wish he was here to steal it now

Somebody else is looking into my mind?

Some Other Time - Alan Parsons Project

In a matter of a moment

Lost till the end of time

It's the evening of another day

And the end of mine

Now the starlight which has found me

Lost for a million years

Tries to linger as it fills my eyes

Till it disappears

Could it be that somebody else is

Looking into my mind

Some other place

Somewhere

Some other time

Some other place

Somewhere

Some other time

Like a mirror held before me

Large as the sky is wide

And the image is reflected

Back to the other side

Could it be that somebody else is

Looking into my mind

Some other place

Somewhere

Some other time

Some other place

Somewhere

Some other time

You’ve had a chance to live your life

Song recommendation: Birmingham Jail by Chatham County Line

Four little girls tying their sash in the basement room that day 

Poking fun and making jokes before getting on their knees to pray 

Just so young with all their dreams and years to their end

Strewn away in the rubble by the hatred of scared white men 

It was early December in the year of ‘63 

George Wallace defied what the federal courts they did decree 

They said make your school doors open for the child of black & white 

Wallace clenched up both his fists and he called out for a fight 

Down in the Birmingham Jail 

Down in the Birmingham Jail 

You’ve had a chance to live your life but now you’re locked. . . 

In the Birmingham Jail 

When the locals heard the news that day, their blood began to boil 

They decided the only good coloured man is down beneath the soil 

So with their hate and money, they began to conspire 

And soon in Birmingham the air was thick with powder and fire 

Down in the Birmingham Jail 

Down in the Birmingham Jail 

You’ve had a chance to live your life but now you’re locked. . .

In the Birmingham Jail 

Four little girls tying their sash in the basement room that day 

Poking fun and making jokes before getting on their knees to pray 

Just so young with all their dreams and years to their end

Strewn away in the rubble by the hatred of scared white men 

Down in the Birmingham Jail 

Down in the Birmingham Jail 

You’ve had a chance to live your life but now you’re locked. . .

In the Birmingham Jail 

Let's still believe in love (Parlons encore d'amour)

Song recommendations: The Ugly and the Beautiful and La Bête et la Belle by (the real) Tuesday Weld

Well after all that we've been through

Would you still call this love baby?

Cause love's the only proof

That the ugly could be beautiful

God knows i'm feeling spent

Though i've still got my money honey

Money's the revenge

Of the ugly on the beautiful

Well the drugs just ain't enough

Though i like the way they made us crazy

But love's the only drug

It turns the ugly into beautiful

And i can't tell you why

I'm still so much afraid of dying

Dying reconciles

The ugly with the beautiful

Though we've been burned by it

Let's still believe in love

Cause love's the greatest gift

Of the ugly to the beautiful

(repeat 1x)

[no video available on you tube]

Au lendemain de nos déboires

Pourra-t'on parler d'amour

Mon amour

Écoute bien cette histoire

C'est l'histoire de la bête et la belle

Dieu sait que j'ai ramé

Mais j'ai gardé mes sous ma pauvre

Dignité

Car l'argent est la revanche

Que la bête prendra sur la belle

Les drogues étaient trop douces

Mais quelle exquise petite folie

Mon amour

Les drogues sont la seule route

Qui fera de la bête une belle

Non ne me demande pas

Pourquoi j'ai tellement peur de mourir

Alors que la mort verra

La bête s'unir à la belle

Bien qu'il nous ait brûlés

Parlons encore d'amour

Car l'amour est le plus vrai

C'est le cadeau de la bête à la belle

Non ne me demande pas

Pourquoi j'ai tellement peur de mourir

Alors que la mort verra

La bête s'unir à la belle

Happy birthday! (Your life still isn't over)

This Post is dedicated to my best friend AI.  Happy birthday!!!!!!!!!!

(Happy Birthday by the Arrogant Worms)

Once a year we celebrate

With stupid hats and plastic plates

The fact that you were able to make

Another trip around the sun

And the whole clan gathers round

And gifts and laughter do abound

And we let out a joyful sound

And sing that stupid song

Happy birthday!

Now you're one year older

Happy birthday!

Your life still isn't over

Happy birthday!

You did not accomplish much

But you didn't die this year

I guess that's good enough

So let's drink to your fading health

And hope you don't remind yourself

your chance of finding fame and wealth

Decrease with every year

Does it feel like you're doing laps

And eating food and taking naps

And hoping that someday perhaps

Your life will hold some cheer

Happy birthday!

What have you done that matters?

Happy birthday!

You're starting to get fatter

Happy birthday!

It's downhill from now on

Try not to remind yourself

Your best years are all gone

If cryogenics were all free

Then you could live like Walt Disney

And live for all eternity

Inside a block of ice

But instead your time is set

This is the only life you get

And though it hasn't ended yet

Sometimes you wish it might

Happy birthday!

You wish you had more money

Happy birthday!

Your life's so sad it's funny

Happy birthday!

How much more can you take?

But your friends are hungry

So just cut the stupid cake

Happy birthday!

Happy birthday!

Happy birthday!

Happy birthday, dear...

(random calling out of names, including Ralph, Bill, Ralph Kramden, bob,

Skippy, the bush kangaroo, Stanly, starts with a 'J', and the b-b-b-b-b-bu-bu-bu- that leads into

"Dangerous")

What I got to do to be heard?

Song recommendation: Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word by Elton John

What I got to do to make you love me?

What I got to do to make you care?

What do I do when lightning strikes me?

And I wake to find that you're not there?

What I got to do to make you want me?

What I got to do to be heard?

What do I say when it's all over?

Sorry seems to be the hardest word.

It's sad, so sad

It's a sad, sad situation.

And it's getting more and more absurd.

It's sad, so sad

Why can't we talk it over?

Oh it seems to me

That sorry seems to be the hardest word.

What do I do to make you want me?

What I got to do to be heard?

What do I say when it's all over?

Sorry seems to be the hardest word.

It's sad, so sad

It's a sad, sad situation.

And it's getting more and more absurd.

It's sad, so sad

Why can't we talk it over?

Oh it seems to me

That sorry seems to be the hardest word.

Yeh. Sorry

What I got to do to make you love me?

What I got to do to be heard?

What do I do when lightning strikes me?

What have I got to do?

What have I got to do?

When sorry seems to be the hardest word.

Dig out the cancer of all human greed

Song recommendation: Rise Up by Flogging Molly

God you say is always the answer

But what is the answer for our cruelty

We punish a life 'til it's life ever after

Ever after the place that we all end up being

O' such is a morn' as this to awaken

Forgotten the hour that was yesterday

With a standing blow to the head of frustration

Divide and we fall have you nothing to say?

[Chorus]

So let us rise up

Stand and be counted, stand and be counted

On that let's agree

Rise up

Dig out the cancer; dig out the cancer of futility

Many's the word that's been broken true anger

Lips that are sealed as the hour slips away

Belief is a joke to this lost generation

Building the walls as the mind segregates

But when all is said

The voice that is silent can't be heard

[Chorus]

For we, we shall overcome... someday

So we bring the head of the ol' palace tribe

For there is the rapture that bleeds out a life

Hand over fist from their pulpit they spew

Liars they'll crumble not knowing the truth

But when all is said

The voice that is silent can't be heard

[Chorus]

So let us rise up

Stand and be counted, stand and be counted

On that let's agree

Let us rise up

Dig out the cancer; dig out the cancer of futility

Rise up

Stand and be counted, stand and be counted

On that let's agree

Let us rise up

Dig out the cancer; dig out the cancer of all human greed

For we, we shall overcome...

Nobody's permanent, everything's on loan here

Song recommendation: Time the Avenger by the Pretenders

Nobody's perfect

Not even a perfect stranger

But oh what a gal

She was such a perfect stranger

And you're the best in your field

In your office with your girls

And desk and leather chair

Thought that time was on your side

But now it's time the avenger

Nobody's permanent

Everything's on loan here

Even your wife and kids

Could be gone next year

And with what you have left

You'll be forever under pressure

To support her

And a lover who looks strangely

Like time the avenger

Time, time, hear the bells chime

Over the harbor and the city

Time, one more vodka and lime

To help paralyze that tiny little tick, tick, tick, tick

Nobody's perfect

Not even a perfect gent

When your property took the a train

I wonder where your manners went

You were standing at the station

In your briefcase

Was your aftershave and underwear

Can you hear the whistle blow?

Sounds like time the avenger

Time, time, hear the bells chime

Over the harbor and the city

Time to kill another bottle of wine

To help paralyze that tiny little tick, tick, tick, tick

While the birds fly, I sink below

Song recommendation: Draw the Stars by Andrea Triana

[I can't find a video that works, try going on YouTube to find it.  It is a lovely song, I'm sure you'll enjoy it]

While the people sleep, I lie awake

Encased in dreams, That carry me

To a distant sound, To undertake

I feel it's way

Even though I am helpless of

The force above

And even though I Can't see far

I hold tighter and draw the stars

While the birds fly

I sink below

Into the cloth and weeping willows

Binding me to the wood

A shelter from a world of good

Even though I am helpless of

The force above

Even though I can't see far

I hold on tighter draw the stars

Upon my page

And while the wind blows

I open my arms

And just let them go

Even though I am helpless of

The force above

Even though I can't see far

I hold on tighter and draw the stars